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Despite me blowing his back out on a repeated basis……….
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And he ended up choosing a white guy over me.
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I was actually kinda feeling out this cute Puerto Rican boy my age for a relationship (I made it very clear). Meanwhile those same guys wouldn’t give my black profile (the real me) the time of day.Īnd I’m not just trying to chase white men either. The messages were pretty desperate and kinda sad. I used an influencer profile for a Grindr (did not feel bad about it either) and my inbox got lit up like a Christmas tree. But you’re right about the top percentile of good looking guys dominating the rest. Most white guys are attracted to other white men in terms of dating. You know good and well, old white dudes in their 40’s don’t interact with the young white men the same way they talk to young black men.Īnd honestly, you sound like a rare case. And this means you get guys your Dad’s age treating you like a 2nd class citizen and offering to pay you money to jack off on them. You get people as they really are because they can hide behind a phone screen. So it’s like a concentrated, purified version of all the dynamics that I made in my original post. Well, if I’m going to be honest, like 99% of my experience meeting guys comes from apps.
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Folks should stop manipulating attraction. Blond Blue-eyed folks as far as I am concerned are not apogee the of good looks. Then most of them cut the velvet rope both straight and gay and start even offering money to be with that woman or man of color, whose way they wouldn’t have glanced in their prime. This discriminatory behavior persists in white guys that work out, until they hit their late 30s. Once this happens they realize that their chances are getting really slim, especially when they are passive, because who would wanna hit that. Furthermore, white guys age faster, looking their best before 28 or earlier. The young insecure POCs are usually their target, because these guys get some gratification from being picked up by those in power. Regarding older gay white guys and young POCs. The black guys are sometimes poor and uneducated. They may end up being your dream man.ĭue to my lack of experience in this, I would just give a more general opinion, because this is the same scenario with some fat white women and black guys, even though I would say that they complement each other thus, because most of these black guys who seek fat white women go for the low hanging fruits and so do the white women. My biggest suggestion is don’t ever treat them like a paycheck (gen/sugar daddy/etc) and give them a chance. Some guys will fetishize and get into the novelty of young or racial guys, but a lot of them would treat you like a prince. So to some degree I think it’s that we “match up” with being open to talking to each other more. Just like you we realize that the same group you find judgmental also judges us. The second answer is that as we get older it’s a harsher world on the apps and scene. I think we also see the struggle non-whites are more likely to deal with and we relate to it and we want to help. I think this led a lot of us to be more open minded to anyone in our community as we’ve gotten older. When I came out, at 19, it was rare and brave for me to be out in most of my world. I feel like younger gays have grown up with a lot more privilege being gay than older guys did. I’m 39 so I’ll give you my answers, I have two. Either way, good luck op, and if we ever hooked up I hope I don’t die on top of you, lol. I wish everyone was open minded all the time and no one had to feel marginalized, not to sound like I’m virtue signaling or anything…. Hence, you as a young (or old for that matter) poc will likely find older men to be much more open minded about who they hook up with or date. As you get older, there are less and less options for sexual partners, less people interested in you, but by extending preferences to a more diverse group of people, whether it’s weight, age, outward appearance (masc/femme/etc) or even race - they’ll have better success meeting more people. I’m white, I’m 40, my partner is Asian and same age, I look geriatric when I stand next to him and we do mostly everything the same for the 15yrs we’ve been together - we both started off as twinks when we met and I turned into a daddy bear, while he’s still a twink.īeing young and inexperienced often pairs with being shallow and choosy about their mate. White guys often look their age or can even appear to age faster than poc who can often appear younger than their age longer. Not the most likable explanation, but someone dropped a theory on me awhile ago that sadly kind of stuck because it made a bit of sense.